It’s true that people are handed things in life. Me included. Private school, vacations, video games, money, a college education, and countless opportunities, these things have participated in bringing me here to this moment – this instance of lying in bed, half-naked, writing a blog post while thinking of ways to improve my future. Heavy stuff…
Anyways, all of that was just set up so I could say this: don’t expect people to hand you things.
That’s kind of the name of the game here, simply because falling prey to the earlier notion that we expect handouts is an unbelievably easy venture – especially when laziness is involved. The destruction of high hopes aside, the sheer presence of entitlement is the real problem.
Entitlement is a plague down here in Los Angeles, though I have spent a good amount of time in Beverly Hills… I refuse to be a part of the problem. I hope there is a difference between being special and expecting the world to cater to your needs.
Because I believe I’m special, I believe I’m destined for great things. That’s not douchiness, that just makes sense to me. Why wouldn’t I think that? It’s my body, my soul, my life – I only get one of these, if I don’t think I will make something of myself then what’s the point?
But there is a very important distinction here: I believe I’m special, you don’t have to. Nor should you until I prove myself. In fact, unless your my parents I wish you wouldn’t, your confidence in me will not help get my big fat ego out of bed in the morning.
And that’s what I need to do, get my lazy ass out of bed. My connection emailed me back and there are no PA job openings now. It’s too late into the season and everything is already filled. His advice was to keep talking to any other connections I might have and work those angles, taking whatever job I can and work my ass off.
He said until the new year it might be hard to find anything, but to keep writing. Keep writing. I can do that. I have this blog, a few pilot ideas, an unfinished feature, hopefully some web series work, and a want to make short films. I should be able to keep myself busy in my off-time.
So, about my “on-time.” I obviously need to pay the bills so a restaurant job seems to be the best way to make a paycheck. I’ll most likely go that direction, but I also need to start taking my Dad’s advice. I need to show up to these studios and make myself known. Simple in theory, but the thought can also be terrifying.
It’s simple putting myself out there through my words – I’m a writer, an introvert by nature. In person, rejected can get slapped directly in my face. Eh, might be good for me. It’s impossible to score if you never shoot.
Okay, here’s a recap. Entitlement is a real bitch, be a better person, put myself out there, and keep writing. All of that is on my to-do list. I’ll be here garnering some courage, thinking new thoughts, and loving my loved ones.
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